May this never be me

Having attended a number of weddings over the past few years, I’ve noticed something peculiar and sad. Fathers, taking over the mic, giving long-winded speeches, as if to make up for lost time. Mothers, imposing their preferences on everyone else, as if to cling to their care-taker positions for one more afternoon. Brides and Grooms, seeking out drama, unable to enjoy the day, as if the very notion of being happy makes their souls squirm. 

Weddings are simply a magnifying glass for this phenomenon. It happens to each of us, in everyday life, often. 

Joy shines a light on our insecurities. When facing pure joy, we can feel unworthy. We turn our faces away from joy, hiding the parts of us we don’t feel have earned it. 

When joy comes to our world, it doesn’t come because we have earned it. It comes because we need it. But in our prove-it-earn-it culture, we turn our faces away from the joy that’s freely available. 

May that never be me.